yesterday on my way to school it was raining but i was too lazy to take out my umbrella so i just stood there under the rain while everyone else was carrying an umbrella. then i just randomly thought to myself "it'd be cool if someone walks up and shares an umbrella with me" and just 3 seconds later someone really did step up. i was like "woa God i was just imagining and you really made it happen!" haha and i turned around and realised it was long chuan.

anyway, last night my brother was having happy time and came back really late. so when he came back and i opened the door, A BAT FLEW INTO THE HOUSE. so i shrieked and ran upstairs thinking i'd be safe there BUT THE BAT FLEW UP TOO! ohmyword i was so freaked out i kept screaming. then it kept flying round and round then IT FLEW UP AND FLEW INTO MY ROOM. rawrrrr. so i forced my brother to chase it out. meanwhile, i was hiding under the study table. yes i figured it was the safest place coz bats fly high. i was about to do my math pt la! but i spent a good 10mins hiding under the study table (occasionally popping up to scream to audrey over msn) that by the time i came out i was so traumatised. ohwells, and coz of the bat i didnt dare to sleep in my own room last night =(

acutally it wasnt really the bat. i kind of had a nightmare 2 nights ago. aye coz my parents arent around so now im like the only one sleeping in the level and its really freaky. so i was really hallucinating a lot that night before finally falling asleep. and well i was hugging my lamb soft toy as usual and by the time i fell asleep it was kind of just resting at my fingertips. and halfway through the night i was like three-quarters asleep when i felt a hand holding the tip of my fingers. so i tried to inch away but it just kept holding my fingertips and then suddenly it slid down towards my palm and grabbed my entire hand. and of course my natural instinct was to struggle even more and i tried to retreat my hand but the hand just grabbed even harder. and as i kept struggling to retreat my hand i heard this low breathing/chuckling noise, presumably the voice of the hand. and at that very moment i LITERALLY PANICKED. i tried to scream BUT I COULDNT MAKE ANY NOISE. i was literally DUMBFOUNDED. i wanted to just let out a cry so i tried opening my mouth but no sound came out at all. and i felt really really helpless and terrified and finally i just thought in my mind "GOD HELP ME" and the whole thing just went away.

ohmyword. i was so terrified at that moment la. this experience is similar to the one i had 2 years ago, the one where there was a black palm pressing my head against the pillow. sigh, why do such things always happen. but i guess this really goes to show how important it is to have faith in our Lord, and most importantly that He will never leave us nor forsake us. the surprising/amazing thing about it is that for these 2 experiences that i had, the moment the black palm left, i just peacefully fell asleep. i didn't have a sleepless night or anything. i guess i was just so comforted to know that He will really always be there for us. in times like these, we don't even need to clasp our hands together to pray or quote a verse. just the call of His name, or even a mere thought of Him is sufficient.

i used to think that only grown ups and close followers of God like missionaries experience such things, so i needn't worry for the time being. but ohwells, i guess i was proven wrong. heh.

today wasn't really a great day. they announced the teams today, which was quite unexpected. sigh i don't feel like saying anything about it here. what happened today kind of affected my mood for the rest of the day. the more i think about it the more moody i get. in this case i don't think abstinence is the solution. i know i have to do something about it. and i have to do it quick.

anyway, thanks to all those who came up to ask me if i was okay! although i didn't even look up and just kept staring at the ground and nodding my head. this post is so sad. i shall try to make my next one happy. cheer up mel! =D there are actually others who ought to be feeling worse than me now, but they're all fine and dandy. yes yes i cannot let this affect my mood. no way. I'LL JUST DO WHAT I NEED TO DO, AND LEAVE THE REST IN GOD'S HANDS.